Today began with my normal blood work check-up to see the doctor. This was a scheduled visit as I see him every 3 weeks after a round of the oral chemo I’m on. I was excited to begin my fourth round and be halfway done with this part of my treatment plan when BAM! Labs came back and due to the increase of my bilirubin count, he’s stopped the oral chemo that I’m on for now. My bulirubin count has been going up ever since I started this medicine but it’s higher now than he’d like to see. I’ll have an ultrasound on my liver next Wednesday to check on what is going on and to see what is causing this number to increase. Last week was my off week of meds so it’s kind of odd that it’s gone up. He truly thinks that all of the chemo I’ve been on is just causing these numbers to elevate, but wants to rule anything else out by taking a closer look. As I was talking with him today, the tears came pretty quickly as a little fear crept in. He assured me that he doesn’t think this has to do with the cancer, but that thought still creeps in and causes me to wonder. I’m ever so thankful for a cautious doctor who stays on top of every little detail and truly cares about little ol’ me.
The quote my mom shared with me this morning really helped ease my mind as you can’t help but wonder “why” sometimes, but trusting and truly knowing Him completely, allows me to see the big picture. My journey is His plan. And each little trouble that comes along is an opportunity to lean on Him even more.
And as I kept reading over Ruth Graham’s quote, I got a text from a dear friend, who is fighting her own battle, while waiting to see the doctor. And what did it say?? It was about fear, with some of the lyrics from one of my favorite songs, “Tremble”.
He does silence fear.
And then she sent this picture of some text from one of my favorite devotion books that I passed on to her, minutes before my doctor came in.
“Only Jesus can save and fill and give what my soul desires. Please remind me to draw close to You and rely on the promise that You will draw close to me when I do.” Whew! Amen.
Talk about the Holy Spirit being present and some perfect timing.
The song by Hannah Kerr, “Warrior”, came to my mind when leaving feeling a little down and unsettled.
Faith is my shield. And His Love is the armor.
Thank you to my prayer warriors, who are constantly lifting my name up to Him.
Those prayers are felt and are so appreciated.
Please pray specifically for me on July 25..
I’ll keep you posted!
Love you all!
“Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34
Sending prayers!
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