Hair drama!

On the morning after I cut my hair, J woke me up singing this sweet song by Steve Holy.  This single came out when I was in college and I still love hearing it on the radio every now and then.  Shaking with tears that morning as he was singing the words, he simply held me and told me that it would be just fine. He always seems to be able to make everything ok.  I constantly think about how different I must look to him now, but am reminded by his words over and over again... he still loves me and sees the girl he fell in love with over 20 years ago. 

So hair is hair.  You cut it. Dye it. Curl it. Straighten it.  I've done all of the above but the hardest thing yet happened today.  Running my hands through it and hair falling out everywhere hit hard. That was tougher than the big cut last Monday night, I think.  Thankfully when this happened my friend Jamie was visiting when I took my hat off to show her my amazing hair.  Ha!  Hair that had beeen shoved in a ball cap all day, itching and driving me absolutely crazy.  I literally ran my hands through it and came out with handfuls of short hair.  I lost it.  She lost it.  But thankfully God  allowed her to be at my house to comfort me while I cried like a little girl.  Gosh!  That's a sweet friend.

So when Jeremy got home and I showed him, he just smiled that sweet smile.  That was all I needed

It's been 12 days since my first treatment and the doctor said it would happen on day 14-22.  Wow!  A little early, but spot on.  Those doctors are smart people!  

So now for the wig story to go along with this crazy hair post.  We wasted no time and the Saturday after I was diagnosed, my best friend Erica and my mom took me to the wig store.  We walked in, and immediately I was drawn to one particular wig.  Long hair, swoop in the front, and one that I could pull back in a ponytail.   Perfect, right!!??   After trying it on I fell in love until I saw the price tag.  $1500 was not ok!  What!!??  Come to find out, it was half real hair/half synthetic!  

The lady immediately found one comparible and I tried it on and loved it too.   We matched my natural color to a sample. They ordered my very own, and within a week I had a beautiful wig waiting for me!  Half the price, and completely synthetic, which doesn't take on the humidity so I'll never have a bad hair day!  Yippee!!!  

I wore my wig to school for the first time last week and so many people commented and said they didn't even know it wasn't my real hair.  WowZers!  That made me feel good.  But then as I looked at pictures from meet the teacher night,  I realized that over the course of the evening, the wig kept inching its way up which made me look like Fran Drescher from The Nanny.  Y'all!  My hair was so big!  

I know this may seem so silly to some of you but I have to make light of this situation.  So the hair that I still have on my head is really thick, really coarse, and really big even thought it is only an inch thick.  That must be the cause of my wig issues lately.  

But now that my hair is officially on the loose and falling out, hopefully the wig will fit nicely to my scalp, not itch me to death, and we can move on.  And have good hair days!  

My friend Beth gave me two of hers that she used when she had Leukemia and I love them.  Especially the one that fits under a ball cap and has nightgown material for the scalp.  It is so much more comfortable than my long hair one.  I'll be sporting that one tons!

So that's the story of the hair.  I know it's temporary but it is a big deal.  I want to look normal for Jett, especially.  He thinks it magical now that I can go from short hair like daddy to long beautiful curly hair like mommy.  He's just in awe and I love it!  A friend shared this with me the other day and it's perfect right now in my hair drama stage that I'm living in!  

The next step is probably to let J shave it completely.  Did I just say that?  Whew!  I just keep reminding myself that this is just a season of my life and that it'll grow back.  It's just hard.  Really hard.  I am constantly praising God for all he's done so far in this journey.  I stop a lot now and just stand still.  Still in his presence. Asking for his embrace during this troublesome time.  As busy as my life is and chaotic at times, being still allows me to feel God's love just a little more.  

Standing still and seeing the eclipse today proved how mighty He is.  

That awesome moment when the moon covered the sun reminded me of His power and all that He created.  It also reassured me that He's got this all under control.  There's no need to worry or be afraid.  His word tells us to trust in him. I am.  Trusting that this whole hair thing will work itself out too.  He knows every hair on my head and will know me bald too.  I trust that.  

"God is my salvation:  I will trust; And will not be afraid."  Isaiah 12.2



  1. The words of your friend say it all. You are beautiful inside and out. As I looked at the eclipse today it reminded me of how God covers us with His love and grace. Praying for you and your precious family.


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